One Major Danger of Infant Baptism

TRENTON, NJ - As the photo above shows, one major danger of infant baptism is when the pastor inadvertently pinches the infant's forehead. And the poor thing can't do nothing but scream !

As congregations in the USA get older, pastors get older as well. Recent studies prove that Presbyterian and Lutheran pastors in particular are struggling with worsening eyesight. When this happens, the pastor is much more likely to accidentally pinch the child instead of sprinkling him.

Research estimates that one out of every 20 babies is now pinched by a pastor with poor eyesight. For example, this past Sunday at Oak Grove Presbyterian Church (PCA) in Trenton saw baby Thomas Reed bruised by pastor Gerald Holmes. According to Daniel Reed (Thomas' father), "We had been looking forward to Sunday for some time. Thirty-two of our family members were in attendance at the service. It was a joyful day until our pastor ruined it by making little Tommy cry. He left a nickel-sized purple and red spot right on Tommy's forehead. My wife started to cry and couldn't stop. The whole baptism was ruined... yep, we're thinking lawsuit; child abuse !"

Not long after the worship service, the ACLU contacted Oak Grove to tell them that if they baptized any more babies, the ACLU would sue for child abuse.

As of this morning, the leadership at Oak Grove is considering leaving the PCA to join ARBCA.